My Not-So-Super Superpower of Invisiblity

    There are definitely perks to being invisible, but I wouldn't say this is one of them. This aching dreariness seeping through me in this packed hallway. This desperate need for connection, contact with a fellow human.

    I know you! I know you! You know me! You were suppose to be my friend--why can't you look at me?

    They're supposed to look at me, I tell myself. Church brothers and sisters. Junior high friends.

    What have a done? What about me makes you twist your neck when I'm coming down the hall? 

    Aren't such sorts of people supposed to love me? This transparent body of mine is crushing me. Weights in my heart sinking me, pulling pulling pulling me.

    You're cool, I'm not. You're a boy, I'm a girl. I'm a freshman, you're a junior. Am I too weird? Am I too awkward?

    The guy in my class says hello with a  smile. The girl in my club hugs me. The player on my team gives me a high five. Me. Me! They are looking at me not through me!

    WHY CAN'T YOU LOOK AT ME?

    I guess the people that care about me might not be the ones I think ought to be caring about me, but they are relevant nonetheless. Because they don't make me feel quite as invisible as

    you.

-Suzanne